10 Best Dressed Video Game Heroes

Uppity game critiques often give gamers a lot of guff for putting too much emphasis on a game’s graphics.  They say that concentrating on how pretty the game is detracts from the underlying factors that make such a game so good including the physics, the script, and the acting (if there is any to speak of).  Problem is, when you take the graphics away from a game you’ve basically got a choose your own adventure book.  So, when you realize that graphical design is really the biggest component of any successful video game, the single most important aspect of a game’s design comes down to how cool the main characters look.

Whether short and dumpy like Mario, big and brutish like Kratos, or just plain bizarre like any number of characters from just about any Japanese RPG, the look of the main character drives the feel of the entire game and can even give developers a little (or a lot) of freedom to cover up weak points in mechanics and plot.
Let’s take a ride down memory lane and examine the 10 Best Dressed Video Game heroes of All Time.

10)  Gordon Freeman (Half Life)


Gordon’s a scientist by day who gets thrown into alternate realities willy nilly with the fate of the world and the entire human race sitting on his shoulders so you wouldn’t expect him to be a flashy dresser.  However, when Gordon trades his lab coat for his orange and black HEV hazard suit he gains +30 to his coolness factor.  There’s nothing his suit can’t handle from hazardous waste to ballistic threat the HEV is what every sharp dressed man should be wearing when reality tears and alternate universes start leaking in.  Props to Gordon for making Emo glasses cool as well.

9)  James Bond (From Russia With Love)


Nothing says cool like James Bond and there’s never been a better one than Sean Connery so in 2005 when EA resurrected the classic flick from 1963 with the likeness and voice talent of The Big Tam (his childhood nickname) gamers were assured they were going to get a heavy dose of class and style.  Bond didn’t disappoint in his classic white dinner jacket (the perfect accessory for hiding that little Walther PPK) and when the going got tough, Bond broke out the classic grey suit and jetpack to take the fashion and death dealing to the next level.

8)  Sam Fisher (Splinter Cell)


My man Sam is a man of few words and his variations on a tried and true theme speak to that stoic nature.  His skintight black body suits are perfect for crawling around in the dark, jumping out of airplanes over targets of opportunity, or sitting fireside with a snifter of brandy and a leather-bound edition of the complete works of William Shakespeare.  In fact, his suit camouflaged him so well the Ubisoft had to put a glowing radio on his shoulder and three beady bright eyes in the front just so you could tell where the man was in the pitch black. 

7)  Manuel Calavera (Grim Fandango)


The Dia de Los Meurtos inspired hero channeled Bogart and Bond when picking out his wardrobe and sported classic white dinner jackets, stylishly cut double breasted suit and even a affected a cigarette for that classic cool look (maybe that’s the reason for his pallid pallor.)  However, when push came to shove, Mr. Calevera kept his Grim Reaper duds in tip top condition and never failed to make a grand entrance.

6)  Rayne (Bloodrayne)


There’s really not much that can top a gorgeous vampire in tight leather and blood red velvet cut to accentuate her . . . assets.  Throw in a couple of vicious arm blades for gory decapitations and dismemberments and you’ve got nearly every Goth dude’s dream.  I have to admit the box art is what convinced me to buy this game back in 2002 and was not disappointed.  However, when Bloodrayne 2 was released, I realized just how much better Rayne could look with updated graphics.

5) Chun Li (Street Fighter)


Sure her attire is a little stereotypical what with the silk dress and peonies but if say anything about it I’m sure miss Li wouldn’t think twice about putting the smack down.  I don’t know what’s more impressive that she can keep her hair in control while doing upside down trawling kicks or that she stays in her dress the whole time.  I suppose it’s a sign of the times that with every iteration of the game she seems to be wearing less and less cloth and showing more skin but oh well; I’m not going to complain.

4) Samus Aran (Metroid)


The armored suit hides all of Samus’ curves and nobody even knew she was a chick until the suit came off in the end of Metroid (Remember your 8-bit days?)  Many of the Metroid games reward the player for beating the game quickly enough by showing progressively more skin beneath Samus’ armor but everything she’s wearing under their looks incredibly dated (like she shops and a eighties swimsuit resale shop.)  The armor however is simply some of the coolest ever designed.  It’s so streamlined and sleek without any of the bells and whistles normally attached to such suits of destruction.  The color scheme may get a little funky in newer games but the classic red and yellow/orange is reminiscent of yet another hero (Tony Stark) any surely spells danger to anything that gets in her way.

3) Agent 47 (Hitman)


Simple and understated are the way to go when you’re trying to hide your identity and this psychotic genetically engineered killer is the essence of cool in his classic dark suit and red tie.  But 47 doesn’t make the list because he shops at Brooks Brothers.  He makes the list because he just plain looks good in everything he tries on from the butcher’s coverall to the doctor’s scrubs.  That’s not an easy thing to do when something as simple as a misplaced stethoscope can alert the authorities to the trouble brewing.  Don’t let this cucumber fool you though, under that collected exterior waits death and destruction.  The only reason he’s not spattered in blood is because he’s good at what he does.

2) Lara Croft (Tomb Raider)


Sure Miss Croft has undergone some . . . enhancements over the course of her career but even back in the day she was setting lonely teenage hearts atwitter with her tank tops and shorty-shorts.  Then game the infamous wet/see through outfit and you would have thought the world exploded.  Even though some of the cats and chicks on this list are graphically superior, Miss Croft takes such a high spot simply because when you strap on skin tight scuba suits and do acrobatic maneuvers that would make a professional contortionist cry you deserve a little something something.

1) Sheva Alomar (Resident Evil 5)


Whether you loved the game or hated it, it’s undeniably one of the best looking games to hit store shelves in 2009.  Gamers expected to see Chris Redfield reprising his role but when they heard he was getting a new partner, they were outright infuriated.  Thankfully the good folks at Capcom decided they had had enough of waifish little white girls and decided to give RE 5 a little spice.  Sheva’s nearly Amazonian in her perfection—built like Jordan Sparks and graceful like Beyonce—but knows that clothes make the woman.  Tight leather and purple blouses complement her tactical harness and holsters perfectly and as you play through the game you realize she’s more than just eye candy.  If you’re anal enough, you could even spend a good chunk of change unlocking two alternate costumes for her, one of which is reminiscent of the heyday of Disco and Studio 54 while the other is just downright dirty.