The Internet - Beta Tests - Idiots

Xarpolis · Posted: 04/12/04 - 22:00 Post subject:

A non-parody editorial

MMO fans are one of the largest collections of fools on the Internet.

A developer gives us a website, a few pages of lore, perhaps a piece of concept art or two, and a message board. Within days they can expect a rabid following of anywhere from 500 to 5,000 people, all debating the pros and cons of their game and asking when they're going to get in beta, without ever writing a single line of code.

I call this phenomenon the Community in a Box.

Imagine a “musician” starting a website. He's never released an album before--he may in fact have never played a single note. All he has is his website, a few words about what he'd like to record for his first album, and a concept sketch of the cover. Nothing specific, but he promises more information soon, or when he finishes a few tracks. He puts up a message board, and encourages people to give their thoughts on the subject.

Now picture this conversation, taking place on said message board:

Fanboy #1: God I hate bass. I just know he's going to use too much bass, and there's no way in hell I'm buying this album if there's bass in it.

Fanboy #2: Are you an idiot? Bass is the best part of the entire album! I refuse to buy an album that doesn't have bass and that's final.

Fanboy #3: Well I think you can strike a balance between bass and treble, there are gray areas you know...

Fanboy #2: Gray area?! Treble is for Carebears; I want bass on every track!

Fanboy #1: But bass ruins the entire album!

This scenario of course would never happen, because no one cares about a man with no prior history, offering no specific details, who is claiming that some time in the future he may or may not release an album. A horde of fans would not magically appear, descend upon his website, and begin discussing something which he has yet to record.

But now replace these words in the Fanboy conversation: Bass with PvP, Treble with PvE, and Album with Game. Viola, you pretty much have any pre-release MMO forum, anywhere on the Internet. Thousands of people arguing about a game about which they know either nothing, or next to nothing about, suggesting changes be made to systems that likely haven't even been programmed yet and may not even make it to the final version.

It would seem that much like members of the Party in George Orwell's 1984, the community as a collective whole is incapable of making logical distinctions between fiction and reality when it comes to the realm of MMOs. If the Party says that Oceania is at war with Eastasia, then Oceania has always been at war with Eastasia. If a developer says a feature will be in release, who are we to doubt?

But rather than being systematically brainwashed by a corrupt political system run amok, we are like the poster on Fox Mulder's wall, "I want to believe." It doesn't matter that the last ten developer's promises never came to fruition, were severely scaled back, or the game was outright canceled. This game will be different. There's no way this team could possibly s***w this up. The game will be without flaw, truly the greatest MMO of all time.

A year of hype later, the game is released a flop. Six months late with missing or incomplete features, unstable code, and without a shred of content.

We grudgingly play it a few weeks because nothing else is out, and then go back to our old reliable, the first or second generation game we continue to have an on again off again love affair with, to see what content they've patched since we last logged in.

Then, a few months down the road, another new MMO is announced and the cycle starts all over again from the beginning. Can we possibly be this stupid? Sadly, yes we can.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to whoring for a beta spot in #Vanguard.

http://www.betawhores.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=6

The Internet - Beta Tests - Idiots

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