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Goraz
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 3736
Location: Philadelphia
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 Posted: 03/15/05 - 15:30 Post subject: Only in America
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ONLY IN AMERICA:
Only in America.....do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. !
Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
EVER WONDER ....
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? !
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
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scoresia
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 10 Mar 2003
Posts: 1500
Location: Florida
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 15:30 Post subject:
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wait for it
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kireol
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 02 Aug 2003
Posts: 9517
Location: Royal Oak, MI
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 15:31 Post subject:
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Nahualli
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 8461
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 15:38 Post subject:
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This goes beyond being a mere repost.
It's like posting that f*****g JibJab cartoon and being like "OMGOZZ CHEK THIS OUT ITS SO FUNNAY!!!"
-Nah-
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Deiahova
Luke Warm
Joined: 18 Feb 2003
Posts: 317
Location: Los Angeles, CA
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 16:14 Post subject:
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| scoresia wrote: | | wait for it |
lol, my thoughts exactly.
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Devook
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 31 Mar 2004
Posts: 2373
Location: Ypsilanti or Troy, MI
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 18:00 Post subject:
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This is like a chain e-mail from the days of AOL 1.0. It's a fucking relic.
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Nictathan
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 5531
Location: here... where I am... not with you
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 20:11 Post subject:
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| kireol wrote: | |
This rocks... need to keep that somewhere
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Kenbin
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 15 Nov 2002
Posts: 1884
Location: New York City
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 20:12 Post subject:
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GORAZ. PLEASE STOP POSTING THESE GAY FORWARDED EMAILS.
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Starks
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 17 Oct 2002
Posts: 865
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 20:15 Post subject:
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Some day I can get to be the person who gets to say 'Wait for it'
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Tiluvas
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 19 Oct 2002
Posts: 2355
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 20:52 Post subject:
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So how many lines did you read before you started thinking about how badly you wanted to post this on realpoor? Was it the 5th line, focusing on hot dogs that really made you chuckle inside and want to share it with others? Or, perhaps it was the line about how politicians are blood sucking leeches. I bet you couldn't wait to post that one, and see how Kbarr and Confused would take that insult. I mean, surely there could be no retort to something like that. Or, perhaps it was the wild and zany fact about the braille lettering on the ATM machines? That is insane, after all, blind people can't drive!
So, tell me, Goraz, which one of these hilarious one-liners was the one that prompted you to post this on realpoor? You know what, I'm going to go out on a limb here, and claim that you didn't even read the entire thing until after you posted it! I'll bet you got this e-mail from your great aunt, and wanted to post it before anybody else and couldn't even read the entire thing. You read the first two lines, and thought it was just so brilliant, and damn it, so true. Only in America, indeed, Goraz.
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Zuldane
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 4057
Location: At sea.
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 21:09 Post subject:
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| Tiluvas wrote: | So how many lines did you read before you started thinking about how badly you wanted to post this on realpoor? Was it the 5th line, focusing on hot dogs that really made you chuckle inside and want to share it with others? Or, perhaps it was the line about how politicians are blood sucking leeches. I bet you couldn't wait to post that one, and see how Kbarr and Confused would take that insult. I mean, surely there could be no retort to something like that. Or, perhaps it was the wild and zany fact about the braille lettering on the ATM machines? That is insane, after all, blind people can't drive!
So, tell me, Goraz, which one of these hilarious one-liners was the one that prompted you to post this on realpoor? You know what, I'm going to go out on a limb here, and claim that you didn't even read the entire thing until after you posted it! I'll bet you got this e-mail from your great aunt, and wanted to post it before anybody else and couldn't even read the entire thing. You read the first two lines, and thought it was just so brilliant, and damn it, so true. Only in America, indeed, Goraz. |
hahahahaha
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Zwadrich
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 5015
Location: The Netherlands
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Posted: 03/15/05 - 21:20 Post subject:
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yea wtg on a 10 year old repost
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Goraz
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 3736
Location: Philadelphia
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 00:15 Post subject:
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| Tiluvas wrote: | So how many lines did you read before you started thinking about how badly you wanted to post this on realpoor? Was it the 5th line, focusing on hot dogs that really made you chuckle inside and want to share it with others? Or, perhaps it was the line about how politicians are blood sucking leeches. I bet you couldn't wait to post that one, and see how Kbarr and Confused would take that insult. I mean, surely there could be no retort to something like that. Or, perhaps it was the wild and zany fact about the braille lettering on the ATM machines? That is insane, after all, blind people can't drive!
So, tell me, Goraz, which one of these hilarious one-liners was the one that prompted you to post this on realpoor? You know what, I'm going to go out on a limb here, and claim that you didn't even read the entire thing until after you posted it! I'll bet you got this e-mail from your great aunt, and wanted to post it before anybody else and couldn't even read the entire thing. You read the first two lines, and thought it was just so brilliant, and damn it, so true. Only in America, indeed, Goraz. |
You wanna know what the pathetic thing is? That it took you longer to type that comment out than it did for me to copy and paste this thread from my work email.
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kireol
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 02 Aug 2003
Posts: 9517
Location: Royal Oak, MI
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 00:21 Post subject:
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| Nictathan wrote: | | kireol wrote: | |
This rocks... need to keep that somewhere |
I made it in a hurry one day for a post here. It's got quite the review. I'd have spent more time on it if i'd have known!
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Maldek
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 16 Oct 2002
Posts: 2089
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 00:22 Post subject:
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The trouncing of Goraz in this thread is undeniable.
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Gethy
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 5595
Location: Tallahassee, FL
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 08:19 Post subject:
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| Goraz wrote: | | Tiluvas wrote: | So how many lines did you read before you started thinking about how badly you wanted to post this on realpoor? Was it the 5th line, focusing on hot dogs that really made you chuckle inside and want to share it with others? Or, perhaps it was the line about how politicians are blood sucking leeches. I bet you couldn't wait to post that one, and see how Kbarr and Confused would take that insult. I mean, surely there could be no retort to something like that. Or, perhaps it was the wild and zany fact about the braille lettering on the ATM machines? That is insane, after all, blind people can't drive!
So, tell me, Goraz, which one of these hilarious one-liners was the one that prompted you to post this on realpoor? You know what, I'm going to go out on a limb here, and claim that you didn't even read the entire thing until after you posted it! I'll bet you got this e-mail from your great aunt, and wanted to post it before anybody else and couldn't even read the entire thing. You read the first two lines, and thought it was just so brilliant, and damn it, so true. Only in America, indeed, Goraz. |
You wanna know what the pathetic thing is? That it took you longer to type that comment out than it did for me to copy and paste this thread from my work email. |
And that's your only come back.
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atarom
Dalai Lama of RealPoor
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 16395
Location: 375th st. Y
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 08:29 Post subject:
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| Nahualli wrote: | This goes beyond being a mere repost.
It's like posting that f---ing JibJab cartoon and being like "OMGOZZ CHEK THIS OUT ITS SO FUNNAY!!!"
-Nah- |
shut up nah
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Paco
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 13 Oct 2002
Posts: 12939
Location: Jacksonville, FL
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 08:52 Post subject:
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| atarom wrote: | | Nahualli wrote: | This goes beyond being a mere repost.
It's like posting that f---ing JibJab cartoon and being like "OMGOZZ CHEK THIS OUT ITS SO FUNNAY!!!"
-Nah- |
shut up nah
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zing!
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Tiluvas
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 19 Oct 2002
Posts: 2355
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 10:54 Post subject:
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| Goraz wrote: | | You wanna know what the pathetic thing is? That it took you longer to type that comment out than it did for me to copy and paste this thread from my work email. |
Yeah, but what I posted was worth reading. 
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Tamrissa
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 29 Nov 2002
Posts: 7100
Location: at my computer
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Posted: 03/16/05 - 15:38 Post subject:
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and made me laugh more.
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