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Occulis
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 13293
Location: Moral Relativity Central
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 Posted: 03/22/04 - 22:22 Post subject: Meanest thing you've done to someone meeting for 1st time?
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About 4 years ago I was heavy into online dating. Mostly to find married women to buy me stuff. Well, 9/10ths of the time the ppl look exactly like they do in their pics. So that's nice.
I met 1 of the ones who lied. 
So! Before I tell you what I did - please to reply to thread with Word and Story and tell me what you did as 1st mean thing.
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Silvermouse
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 11015
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Posted: 03/22/04 - 22:28 Post subject:
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I met this lady and took her and her kids to the park. We spent the whole day there and skipped lunch. The kids complained a little, but the lady was obviously too nervous to bring it up to me.
Anyways, we get back to my place and I send the lady to the store to get some celery and spices for dinner. Her kids' dad comes and gets them while she's gone. She gets back and I have already started cooking dinner.
I mix in the spices and she wolfs down the pork I'd made, exclaiming over the taste. Then I bring over a silver platter, remove the top and underneath are the pieces of her kids that I couldn't work into the meal: the heads, feet, hands, etc. Their dad hadn't really picked them up, loll1
She screamed and I smiled as she vomited up what she could. And that's how I met my wife Tena!
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Occulis
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 13293
Location: Moral Relativity Central
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Posted: 03/22/04 - 22:31 Post subject:
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| Silvermouse wrote: | | She screamed and I smiled as she vomited up what she could. And that's how I met my wife Tena! |
haha hot shit
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WhiteWidow
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 975
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Posted: 03/22/04 - 22:34 Post subject:
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| Code: | | i smoke a blunt a day 4 my fallen niggaz |
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Zapper
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 1512
Location: Connecticut
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Posted: 03/22/04 - 22:34 Post subject:
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Did you happily lap up the vomit as at regurgitated from her stomach? I am sure that is what endeared you to her.
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wellspoken
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Posts: 7137
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 13:53 Post subject:
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| Silvermouse wrote: | I met this lady and took her and her kids to the park. We spent the whole day there and skipped lunch. The kids complained a little, but the lady was obviously too nervous to bring it up to me.
Anyways, we get back to my place and I send the lady to the store to get some celery and spices for dinner. Her kids' dad comes and gets them while she's gone. She gets back and I have already started cooking dinner.
I mix in the spices and she wolfs down the pork I'd made, exclaiming over the taste. Then I bring over a silver platter, remove the top and underneath are the pieces of her kids that I couldn't work into the meal: the heads, feet, hands, etc. Their dad hadn't really picked them up, loll1
She screamed and I smiled as she vomited up what she could. And that's how I met my wife Tena! |
hahhaha,
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Tiluvas
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 19 Oct 2002
Posts: 2355
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 14:00 Post subject:
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I regularly attend bukkake parties, and our group was going to be initiating a new female member. Well, in preperation for this, I masturbated three times a day for two weeks. This gets my body used to regularly ejaculating, and increases the amount of semen production to meet my demands. Four days before the party, I stopped ejaculating. I did this to build up a large supply of semen, in order to please the new member. 24 Hours before the party started, I would masturbate to the brink of orgasm every 4 hours, in order to build up an even larger supply of ejaculate. When the party started, I was the twelth guy to go, and I shot the biggest load of my life all over her mouth, and I even got some in her eyes. I didn't mean to get it in her eyes, and it caused her quite a bit of pain. Two months later, and she's completely immune to getting ejaculate in her eye and even looks forward to it!
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Occulis
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 13293
Location: Moral Relativity Central
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 14:13 Post subject:
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Tiluvas is what happens when Silvermouse ceases interest in a career in writing and, instead, focuses on putting hispenis in every living hole of every creature possible. This is most strange!
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Guest
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 14:28 Post subject:
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Dunked their head in a toilet? Numerous times?
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Ikkan
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 06 Sep 2003
Posts: 3086
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 15:29 Post subject:
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| Tiluvas wrote: | | I regularly attend bukkake parties, and our group was going to be initiating a new female member. Well, in preperation for this, I masturbated three times a day for two weeks. This gets my body used to regularly ejaculating, and increases the amount of semen production to meet my demands. Four days before the party, I stopped ejaculating. I did this to build up a large supply of semen, in order to please the new member. 24 Hours before the party started, I would masturbate to the brink of orgasm every 4 hours, in order to build up an even larger supply of ejaculate. When the party started, I was the twelth guy to go, and I shot the biggest load of my life all over her mouth, and I even got some in her eyes. I didn't mean to get it in her eyes, and it caused her quite a bit of pain. Two months later, and she's completely immune to getting ejaculate in her eye and even looks forward to it! |
u sir r teh weirdz
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Silvermouse
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 11015
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 16:30 Post subject:
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| Occulis wrote: | | Tiluvas is what happens when Silvermouse ceases interest in a career in writing and, instead, focuses on putting hispenis in every living hole of every creature possible. This is most strange! |
Tiluvas whipped my ass at Unreal the other night. It's funny, because my character is this tough, cool male, while his is some skinny female (probably chosen because she's harder to hit).
Anyways, I felt dominated and embarrassed, but in a **** kind of way! Tiluvas, you really
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Tolanin
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 16 Oct 2002
Posts: 3551
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 17:22 Post subject:
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silvermouse your storys are very very disturbing, how the hell do you think up that shit.
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Tiluvas
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 19 Oct 2002
Posts: 2355
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 17:33 Post subject:
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| Silvermouse wrote: | | Occulis wrote: | | Tiluvas is what happens when Silvermouse ceases interest in a career in writing and, instead, focuses on putting hispenis in every living hole of every creature possible. This is most strange! |
Tiluvas whipped my ass at Unreal the other night. It's funny, because my character is this tough, cool male, while his is some skinny female (probably chosen because she's harder to hit).
Anyways, I felt dominated and embarrassed, but in a **** kind of way! Tiluvas, you really |
Yes, I remember seeing your model. He was a wholesome and handsome fellow, and he seemed so **** innocent and headstrong. It reminded me in a way of your avatar of the Suikoden 2 hero. He looked so determined to win and fight the evils of the Unreal universe, as you stood still in the corner firing the purple gun thing as people passed you by.
I chose her because she looked the ****???
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Silvermouse
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 11015
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Posted: 03/23/04 - 20:02 Post subject:
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My guy just looks like a good guy. But sadly, I just can't catch up with the lightning fast double flips and side jumps.
I'll just get one of those hacks that kills someone on the screen everytime I pull the trigger.
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Tamrissa
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 29 Nov 2002
Posts: 7100
Location: at my computer
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 17:19 Post subject:
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well dunn lets hear it.....
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Tinladar
Sir Postalot
Joined: 03 Jan 2003
Posts: 1448
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 17:51 Post subject:
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yar, i'm wondering too!
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Spink
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 16 Oct 2002
Posts: 1599
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 19:00 Post subject:
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I begged him to tell me and now he probably feels like he already told the story here but didn't.
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Xarpolis
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 15 Oct 2002
Posts: 2884
Location: Philly, PA
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 19:19 Post subject:
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Dunn, share your story, god damnit !
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Occulis
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 13293
Location: Moral Relativity Central
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 20:16 Post subject:
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O sorry
so ya i knew she was gonna be fat, despite what her pics looked like. and despite asking sly questions like, "So... you work out a lot? Oh really? What gym?" etc.
So I took a box of girlscout cookies and instead of taking her out to eat, I gave her those and dropped her off at Hardee's.
The End.
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KapnKimchi
Luke Warm
Joined: 15 Oct 2003
Posts: 311
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 20:30 Post subject:
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Was in college and passed out in some chicks room and didnt want to walk all the way down to the guys area to hit the bathroom so I p****d in an empty beer bottle. Woke up shortly after and saw the chicks roommate come in and take a swig out of the bottle I p****d in. I couldnt stop laughing. =/
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Goraz
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 3736
Location: Philadelphia
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 20:31 Post subject:
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f****d her and left.
Then Minion was born
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Silvermouse
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 11015
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Posted: 03/24/04 - 21:32 Post subject:
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| Occulis wrote: | O sorry
so ya i knew she was gonna be fat, despite what her pics looked like. and despite asking sly questions like, "So... you work out a lot? Oh really? What gym?" etc.
So I took a box of girlscout cookies and instead of taking her out to eat, I gave her those and dropped her off at Hardee's.
The End. |
...and that women was Kirstie Alley, and the cookies she ate...thin mints.
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