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Paco
RealPoor Jedi

Joined: 13 Oct 2002 Posts: 12939
Location: Jacksonville, FL
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 07:52 Post subject: J.Lo-Butt Implants Explode!
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hahahahahha, stupid b***h
J.Lo-Butt Implants Explode!
Tuesday April 13, 2004
A woman who yearned to have a bottom as luscious and rounded as the rear end of pop star Jennifer Lopez has found her dreams blasted to smithereens -- after her butt implants exploded!
Candy Jones- Davies, 22, vows to sue the hospital where surgeons allegedly pumped the implants so full of curve-creating air, they both blew sky-high -- right on the operating table.
And she says a surgical nurse has agreed to testify in her attempt to collect $17.5 million for medical expenses, lost future wages and emotional pain and suffering.
"She told me they had just put in the implants, when one of the surgeons -- she's not sure which one, but she knows what he said -- started saying, 'Well, if she wants J.Lo's butt, let's give it to her.' And they pumped more air into the implants. Then another one said, 'Come on, that's nothing, let's go for it.' And they just kept pushing the limit until it all just exploded."
Jones-Davies, a receptionist from Pretoria, South Africa, says that before the butt blast, she was on the verge of signing a modeling contract with the talent agency where she works.
"They told me if I got butt implants to look like J.Lo, I could be one of their top girls," she says.
Instead, Jones-Davies not only suffered second- and third-degree burns to both cheeks, but because of tissue loss her behind is even smaller and flatter than before the surgery.
"I'm flat as a board," says Jones-Davies. "No one's going to sign a fashion model who looks like an 80-year-old man from the back.
"I'm lucky to have a job at all -- I can't sit for more than 20 minutes at a time before my backside gets numb and I get stabbing pains down my legs. I'm just lucky they let me take a lot of breaks at work, or this ugly can would be getting me canned."
A hospital spokeswoman says Davies-Jones' doctors were using a new inflatable implant that adjusts to a custom-fitted size. She says the hospital may file a defective- product complaint against the manufacturer.
She adds that Jones-Davies "must also bear some responsibility" for the fanny fiasco.
"She told our doctors at the initial consultation that she wanted to 'out-J.Lo J.Lo' -- her exact words, I'm told," says the spokeswoman. "And with all due respect, she had a long way to go to even begin to have the firm, well-rounded proportions of Miss Lopez. If our doctors failed, it was in trying too hard to serve their patient.
"And," she adds, "our surgeons' quick response actually minimized the damage to Miss Jones-Davies, who would have no bottom at all if not for their knowledge and skill."
Davies-Jones angrily rejects that claim.
"I might have said something like that, but they are doctors, and they should know how far to go before it gets dangerous," she says.
"And I didn't think they'd pump me up so much I'd pop like a balloon at a kid's birthday party."
http://entertainment.tv.yahoo.com//entnews/wwn/20040413/108186840004.html
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Celestra
RealPoor Master of Posts

Joined: 11 Oct 2002 Posts: 6929
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 08:01 Post subject:
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thats f*****g hilarious
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Paco
RealPoor Jedi

Joined: 13 Oct 2002 Posts: 12939
Location: Jacksonville, FL
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 08:19 Post subject:
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and sad, all at the same time..
I wonder how that'd feel, if you grabbed her ass..
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Finigan
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 11 Oct 2002 Posts: 3817
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 08:21 Post subject:
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I bet the b***h is ugly.
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kemble
RealPoor Sensei

Joined: 14 Oct 2002 Posts: 1909
Location: MI
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 08:59 Post subject:
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| Finigan wrote: | | I bet the b***h is ugly. |
guaranteed.
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Overon
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 14 Oct 2002 Posts: 3602
Location: PLANE OF PIXIES
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 10:13 Post subject:
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i have to wonder what sitting on air-pumped assplants feels like
and if they would pop if you fell down
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sinrakin
RealPoor Master of Posts

Joined: 11 Oct 2002 Posts: 7044
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 10:17 Post subject:
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So how did she get second and third degree burns? What were they filling the implants with, propane?
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Frehya
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 11 Oct 2002 Posts: 2398
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 10:34 Post subject:
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| sinrakin wrote: | | So how did she get second and third degree burns? What were they filling the implants with, propane? |
Helium? Nuthin like a little lift to your tushie.
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Tamrissa
RealPoor Master of Posts

Joined: 29 Nov 2002 Posts: 7100
Location: at my computer
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 10:40 Post subject:
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holy shit freyha i almost squirted coffee out my nose!
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Obmar
RealPoor Sensei

Joined: 22 Oct 2002 Posts: 1934
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 11:53 Post subject:
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that article is so sad on so many levels
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Overon
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 14 Oct 2002 Posts: 3602
Location: PLANE OF PIXIES
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 11:58 Post subject:
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think, if she got them and they didnt explode we might be seeing this article:
Woman saves children from drowning by using ass implants as a floatation device
Children interviewed said, "She just jumped in the water and said 'Grab on kids!' .. I think I could have swam out on my own .. but .. I grabbed .. and just went with it .."
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Herbgotti
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 14 Oct 2002 Posts: 2110
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 12:38 Post subject:
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| Finigan wrote: | | I bet the b***h is ugly. |
i bet your f*****g ugly..
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Ikkan
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 06 Sep 2003 Posts: 3086
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 12:41 Post subject:
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| Overon wrote: | think, if she got them and they didnt explode we might be seeing this article:
Woman saves children from drowning by using ass implants as a floatation device
Children interviewed said, "She just jumped in the water and said 'Grab on kids!' .. I think I could have swam out on my own .. but .. I grabbed .. and just went with it .." |
butt implants should be a must for all female lifeguards
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Nahualli
RealPoor Master of Posts

Joined: 11 Oct 2002 Posts: 8461
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 13:16 Post subject:
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| Overon wrote: | think, if she got them and they didnt explode we might be seeing this article:
Woman saves children from drowning by using ass implants as a floatation device
Children interviewed said, "She just jumped in the water and said 'Grab on kids!' .. I think I could have swam out on my own .. but .. I grabbed .. and just went with it .." |
LIKE POWDERED TOAST MAN !!!
CLING TENACIOUSLY TO MY BUTTOCKS !!!!
-Nah-
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atarom
Guest
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 14:43 Post subject:
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lol you guys believe anything you read.... especially on the internet.... come on..
| Quote: | More from Weekly World News
• Feature from the WWN
• WWN WebGuide
• Subscribe to the WWN |
world weekly news. definitely a reliable source for your celebrity news.
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Gato
Can't Stop Posting

Joined: 13 Oct 2002 Posts: 706
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 17:37 Post subject:
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Its not true?
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Finigan
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 11 Oct 2002 Posts: 3817
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 18:33 Post subject:
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| Herbgotti wrote: | | Finigan wrote: | | I bet the b***h is ugly. |
i bet your f*****g ugly.. |
my what is f*****g ugly?
Oh wait.. did you mean you're? Haha you can't spell.
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Spitulski
RealPoor Guru

Joined: 23 Nov 2002 Posts: 4344
Location: Washington
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Posted: 07/22/04 - 18:34 Post subject:
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That is absolutely asstastic.
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