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Occulis
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 13293
Location: Moral Relativity Central
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 Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:28 Post subject: I haven't done this in a while
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Talked about pooping, that is.
You know how sometimes you'll go a day or 2 and pooping seems minimal? Then all of a sudden your bowels will empty like a tube of Crest under an SUV tire?
Well, hey! Sunday I was feeling mildly ill in the belly. Like the beginnings of food poisoning. You know how that is? Like a gut full of pudding and gravel.
Gurgle gurgle. Gurgle gurgle.
Around 11pm I went to sleep and all was well.
Monday, though, I woke up and unloaded the most monstrous of s***s I have ever seen. It was at least 18 inches long, thick as my anus can press em, and tapered magnificently at both ends. It lay there, docile and unassuming, coiled into almost a two-ring toilet beast.
Floosh! Yeah! Haha! Down goes the turd! Whoopeee!
I felt a lot better.
About 2 hours later, the same thing happened. Whoah. I think part of that one came out of my neck. Wow. Twice in one day!
More flooshing and flushing and hand washing.
Four hours later, another monstrosity crawled out of my ass. Over a foot long and looking to weigh in at 2 pounds, this one scared me. Could my body really create that much poop?
Could it? Could it, really?
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Ikkan
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 06 Sep 2003
Posts: 3086
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:33 Post subject:
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oh man you have those aliens like in Dreamcatcher!
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Paco
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 13 Oct 2002
Posts: 12940
Location: Jacksonville, FL
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:36 Post subject:
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I thought you were going to tell us about how you slapped your woman around in the face with your mansausage.
oh well 
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Maldek
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 16 Oct 2002
Posts: 2089
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:43 Post subject:
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pics plsz
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Ikkan
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 06 Sep 2003
Posts: 3086
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:43 Post subject:
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Xieroth
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 17 Oct 2002
Posts: 1902
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:55 Post subject:
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Some people only poop like once or twice a week.
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Ikkan
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 06 Sep 2003
Posts: 3086
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 10:56 Post subject:
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| Xieroth wrote: | | Some people only poop like once or twice a week. |
f**k them man
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Paco
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 13 Oct 2002
Posts: 12940
Location: Jacksonville, FL
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 11:03 Post subject:
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| Xieroth wrote: | | Some people only poop like once or twice a week. |
that's f****d up
and i don't think it's healthy
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kemble
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 14 Oct 2002
Posts: 1912
Location: MI
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 12:04 Post subject:
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Manuva
Banned
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 2536
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 12:09 Post subject:
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| Paco wrote: | I thought you were going to tell us about how you slapped your woman around in the face with your mansausage.
oh well |
Would have been funnier if he told us how he slapped her around in the face with a foot long turd.
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 12:14 Post subject:
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Stop eating so healthy.
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wellspoken
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Posts: 7137
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 12:24 Post subject:
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g*****n that b***h shit a f*****g load.
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 12:47 Post subject:
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| wellspoken wrote: | | g*****n that b***h shit a f*****g load. |
10 bucks says its melted chocolate and assorted extras they pumped up her ass.
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Kukoc
Luke Warm
Joined: 11 Apr 2005
Posts: 334
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Posted: 05/27/05 - 13:03 Post subject:
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yum, soft serve
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