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Paco
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 13 Oct 2002
Posts: 12939
Location: Jacksonville, FL
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 Posted: 06/29/05 - 09:28 Post subject: History Lesson
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History Lesson
History began some 12,000 years ago. Humans existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer & would go to the coast & live on fish & lobster in winter.
The 2 most important events in all of history were the invention of beer & the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer.
These were the foundation of modern civilization & together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into 2 distinct subgroups:
Liberals & Conservatives.
Once beer was discovered it required grain & that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early human ancestors were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.
Some men spent their days tracking & killing animals to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as "the Conservative movement."
Other men who were weaker & less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's & doing the sewing, fetching & hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.
Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as 'girlymen.'
Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy & group hugs & the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat & beer that conservatives provided.
Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the j*****s.
Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, & French food are standard liberal fare. Another interesting revolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men.
Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood & group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher also bat.
Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat & still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys,
lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, soldiers, athletes & generally anyone who works productively outside government.
Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.
Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the producers &decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tame & created a business of trying to get MORE for nothing.
Here ends the lesson in world history.
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Celestra
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 6929
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 09:36 Post subject:
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WE GET MORE FOR NOTHING?!
OMG, point me to the nearest shoppingmall!
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IceIsFun
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 781
Location: Orlando, FL
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 10:13 Post subject:
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| Quote: | | Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as 'girlymen.' |
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Soriak
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 952
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 10:39 Post subject:
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Die-hard conservatives
The die-hard conservative is an interesting specimen. Most of his time is spent working a blue-collar job, often under immense pressure and inhuman conditions. Nevertheless he supports big business and considers his country far superior to any other on grounds that it is the only place offering the freedoms he enjoys. He condemns those trieing to stick up for the worker (ie him) and instead favors his own exploitation. Usually he is only a small accident away from becoming homeless - a group of people he despises due to their inability to get work.
Lack of tollerance, the failure to see and accept any view other than his own and the frequent uses of ad hominem attacks make him easy to spot.
Mostly agressive, he has the remarkable ability to deceive himself and fails to see anything contradicting his imagination of a perfect place he calls "home."
Much like his ancestor, the ape, whom the conservative denies any relationship to, except for both being created by god, the conservative is unable to take part in a sophisticated discussion and instead resorts to throwing feces at those who disagree with him.
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:01 Post subject:
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Liberals..
The stupid people. Go to any large city, you can find them massed there like maggots on a road kill.
If it wasn't for cities and the losers that live there, the democratic party would never win an election. Think about it stupid people. The Jesse jackson delegation, the Al Sharpton delegation, the Mike Moore delegation, the Ted Kennedy delegation, it goes on and on.
These are the democrats, the liberals, the scum.
Disgusting.
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Qaldyin
Sir Postalot
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 1346
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:08 Post subject:
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You know, Kbarr, 99% of the people who consider themselves conservatives don't have so much hate built up like you do. They are normal people, who can coexist with others...
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:34 Post subject:
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| Qaldyin wrote: | | You know, Kbarr, 99% of the people who consider themselves conservatives don't have so much hate built up like you do. They are normal people, who can coexist with others... |
Socialist scumbag. Go back to goat f*****g land and stay out of my country.
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Qaldyin
Sir Postalot
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 1346
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:35 Post subject:
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Why the f**k should I leave? I have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. 
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Scrabler
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 2660
Location: Mobile, AL
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:45 Post subject:
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| Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? My parents have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
Sorry money doesn't mean you contribute shit. Service of the country is the biggest contribution you can make.
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Qaldyin
Sir Postalot
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 1346
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:56 Post subject:
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Money makes the world go round.
He's not providing much of a service and neither are you, you idiots despise half the country. What kind of service is that?
Edit: cause I just read what you changed from my post.
I co-own a business and I'm 19. We manage assets and provide health/life insurance, making me an integral part.
You don't even have a high school diploma yet, don't speak lol.
Last edited by Qaldyin on 06/29/05 - 14:02; edited 1 time in total
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Soriak
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 952
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 13:56 Post subject:
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| Scrabler wrote: | | Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? My parents have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
Sorry money doesn't mean you contribute shit. Service of the country is the biggest contribution you can make. |
Right.. keep telling yourself that. People paying taxes help the government a lot more than one more mouth they have to feed and house.
Budget Deficit - a much bigger problem than terrorists.
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Qaldyin
Sir Postalot
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 1346
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 14:05 Post subject:
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My dad is also president of a non profit cancer research foundation, so again, f**k you and your minor contributions!
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 14:08 Post subject:
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| Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? I have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
You have no idea how much I'm worth:)
But that doesn't mean anything anyway. You are a socialist f**k living in my country making political comment like you count.
You don't.
Go back to where goats are a **** object, your visa is up.
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 14:09 Post subject:
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| Soriak wrote: | | Scrabler wrote: | | Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? My parents have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
Sorry money doesn't mean you contribute shit. Service of the country is the biggest contribution you can make. |
Right.. keep telling yourself that. People paying taxes help the government a lot more than one more mouth they have to feed and house.
Budget Deficit - a much bigger problem than terrorists. |
Stupid liberal.
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Qaldyin
Sir Postalot
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 1346
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 16:21 Post subject:
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Always the same!
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Silvermouse
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 11015
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 16:24 Post subject:
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| Scrabler wrote: | | Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? My parents have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
Sorry money doesn't mean you contribute shit. Service of the country is the biggest contribution you can make. |
Is it? How about everyone in this country who works takes a week off? What would happen, Scrabler?
Having a job and a place in the economy is the best way to contribute to the country.
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wellspoken
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Posts: 7137
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 16:28 Post subject:
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| Kbarr wrote: | | Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? I have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
You have no idea how much I'm worth:)
But that doesn't mean anything anyway. You are a socialist f**k living in my country making political comment like you count.
You don't.
Go back to where goats are a **** object, your visa is up. |
You draw a cops pension, my guess is your not rich! Like that matters anyways.
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Devook
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 31 Mar 2004
Posts: 2373
Location: Ypsilanti or Troy, MI
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 16:31 Post subject:
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| Scrabler wrote: | | Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? My parents have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
Sorry money doesn't mean you contribute shit. Being a zergling is the biggest contribution you can make. |
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kbarr
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 05 Oct 2004
Posts: 11239
Location: New York, now go fuck off...
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Posted: 06/29/05 - 20:00 Post subject:
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| wellspoken wrote: | | Kbarr wrote: | | Qaldyin wrote: | Why the f**k should I leave? I have more money than you, so I contribute more than you do =p
I'm staying and you're gonna love it. |
You have no idea how much I'm worth:)
But that doesn't mean anything anyway. You are a socialist f**k living in my country making political comment like you count.
You don't.
Go back to where goats are a **** object, your visa is up. |
You draw a cops pension, my guess is your not rich! Like that matters anyways. |
I own real estate that produces income. More then one:) I have investments beyond real estate. I have a large pension. I have health care, dentist and eye care for life. I have large bank and a large wallet.
I am DA KING!
You are a tiny unproven liberal pussyface in extended high school.
/yawn
/stretch
/scratch
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