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Xieroth
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 17 Oct 2002
Posts: 1902
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 Posted: 03/06/05 - 19:57 Post subject: Cowboy Joke (Political, don't take it seriously you twats)
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An old cowboy was herding his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW came out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in a fancy suit and tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"
The old cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure. Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility.
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formula He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves ," says the cowboy.
He watches the young man select an animal and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the old cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You're a Republican Party Adviser" says the cowboy.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the old cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked; and you don't know anything about my business...
......Now give me back my dog.
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Brael
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 2122
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Posted: 03/06/05 - 20:47 Post subject:
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Heard that joke before except the yuppie was a consultant rather than republician party adviser
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Callaren
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 03 Dec 2003
Posts: 1598
Location: South Jersey
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Posted: 03/06/05 - 22:21 Post subject:
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I heard it before but it was a blone and sheep in the country.
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Baha
Sir Postalot
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 1214
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Posted: 03/06/05 - 22:51 Post subject:
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meh, relatively humorous but could use the needs more funnay pic
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Mugaaz
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 16 Oct 2002
Posts: 3576
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Posted: 03/06/05 - 23:02 Post subject:
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| Brael wrote: | | Heard that joke before except the yuppie was a consultant rather than republician party adviser |
Me too. I can't believe there is someone lame enough to change a joke like that to suit their political view.
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Brael
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 2122
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Posted: 03/06/05 - 23:32 Post subject:
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Espically when the joke lost the funny as a result. Would be cool if the joke was still amusing.
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Xieroth
RealPoor Sensei
Joined: 17 Oct 2002
Posts: 1902
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Posted: 03/06/05 - 23:40 Post subject:
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I don't know the original joke. My emailed this to me so I decided it was worth a post. If someone wants to edit it and PM me i'll edit the parent to reflect the original version.
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Kilzalot
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 21 Oct 2002
Posts: 2080
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Posted: 03/07/05 - 09:24 Post subject:
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| Brael wrote: | | Heard that joke before except the yuppie was a consultant rather than republician party adviser |
yuppie was in management in the version I heard. And yea, the joke took on a new level of gheyness and lost it's funny when someone tried to f**k it up with politics.
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