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Mental Hernia
Rookie
Joined: 13 Mar 2003
Posts: 89
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 Posted: 07/02/03 - 11:55 Post subject: Confused
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Ever get so confused?
This relates to work, again. I was at work the other day, and someone pleaded with me to serve them a large popcorn, and I thought about it, more than I usually do. Why does he need the popcorn? Why do I need the popcorn? As it is my job, I reluctantly agreed. I scooped a large helping of popcorn into the bag, and then another.
As I did this, the popcorn began to devour my arm, in a cool tingling sensation one can only get when serving popcorn. The kernels were now teeth, biting me, and licking me, like little golden retriever puppies. Maybe this was why he wanted the popcorn. But how could he know?
Then I served him the butter, and it dripped down, the coldest thing I had ever seen. Some of it missed the bag, and what a terrible waste it was. I bent my head down, and licked it up. I've never been so refreshed in my life.
I handed him the bag, and he handed me the money, and our exchange was made. I still had popcorn, and now he had popcorn. It was his job to pour salt over it, and that is a sensation I cannot experience.
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-Reneloth-
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 959
Location: Dallas, TX
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 11:58 Post subject:
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Dawg... you need help.
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compusmack
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 15 Oct 2002
Posts: 6354
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 12:08 Post subject: Re: Confused
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| Mental Hernia wrote: | Ever get so confused?
This relates to work, again. I was at work the other day, and someone pleaded with me to serve them a large popcorn, and I thought about it, more than I usually do. Why does he need the popcorn? Why do I need the popcorn? As it is my job, I reluctantly agreed. I scooped a large helping of popcorn into the bag, and then another.
As I did this, the popcorn began to devour my arm, in a cool tingling sensation one can only get when serving popcorn. The kernels were now teeth, biting me, and licking me, like little golden retriever puppies. Maybe this was why he wanted the popcorn. But how could he know?
Then I served him the butter, and it dripped down, the coldest thing I had ever seen. Some of it missed the bag, and what a terrible waste it was. I bent my head down, and licked it up. I've never been so refreshed in my life.
I handed him the bag, and he handed me the money, and our exchange was made. I still had popcorn, and now he had popcorn. It was his job to pour salt over it, and that is a sensation I cannot experience. |
haha.
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ATM Banana
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 02 Jan 2003
Posts: 8575
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 12:09 Post subject:
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mental, you may want to start looking into a new job.
now.
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-Reneloth-
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 959
Location: Dallas, TX
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 12:12 Post subject:
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| ATM Banana wrote: | mental, you may want to start looking into a new job.
now. |
and a psychiatrist.
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Occulis
RealPoor Jedi
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 13293
Location: Moral Relativity Central
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 12:14 Post subject: Re: Confused
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| Mental Hernia wrote: | Ever get so confused?
This relates to work, again. I was at work the other day, and someone pleaded with me to serve them a large popcorn, and I thought about it, more than I usually do. Why does he need the popcorn? Why do I need the popcorn? As it is my job, I reluctantly agreed. I scooped a large helping of popcorn into the bag, and then another.
As I did this, the popcorn began to devour my arm, in a cool tingling sensation one can only get when serving popcorn. The kernels were now teeth, biting me, and licking me, like little golden retriever puppies. Maybe this was why he wanted the popcorn. But how could he know?
Then I served him the butter, and it dripped down, the coldest thing I had ever seen. Some of it missed the bag, and what a terrible waste it was. I bent my head down, and licked it up. I've never been so refreshed in my life.
I handed him the bag, and he handed me the money, and our exchange was made. I still had popcorn, and now he had popcorn. It was his job to pour salt over it, and that is a sensation I cannot experience. |
This is, without doubt, the most wonderful thing I have ever read on RealPoor.
Sir - you have tapped into IT. Please continue!
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ATM Banana
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 02 Jan 2003
Posts: 8575
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 12:14 Post subject:
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or some porn, that always clears things up for me.
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sinrakin
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 7044
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 13:03 Post subject:
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I'm surprised they let you do drugs at work.
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wellspoken
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Posts: 7137
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 19:53 Post subject:
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funny shit 
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Janoth
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 17 Nov 2002
Posts: 3135
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 20:01 Post subject:
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Slowly step away from the popcorn machine with your hands in the air.
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Kendolekk
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 12 Oct 2002
Posts: 750
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Posted: 07/02/03 - 20:28 Post subject:
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Damn columbians and their brainwashing Zombie drugs.
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lumber
Luke Warm
Joined: 08 May 2003
Posts: 331
Location: Central Florida
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Posted: 07/03/03 - 08:01 Post subject:
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May this story never end! Please sir more, more.
This is what I have been looking for on the internet all these years.
Can we start a post hall of f*****g fame. I mean jesus, this is GOLDEN
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Mental Hernia
Rookie
Joined: 13 Mar 2003
Posts: 89
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Posted: 08/09/03 - 23:02 Post subject:
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Need more honest opinions!
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lumber
Luke Warm
Joined: 08 May 2003
Posts: 331
Location: Central Florida
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Posted: 08/09/03 - 23:27 Post subject:
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Again, my friend, I went to see American Wedding tonight. As I stood in line for what would eventually become MY popcorn, I thought about this exact post and how the guy with the giant hoop through his ear could never salt my corn and I smiled. I can honestly say that no matte what drama may come to the blessd boards and no matter who posts here and no matter who Kobe Bryant rapes, this post- the one above - is the greates of all time. Period. End of Story.
Except for Kbarr's pigeon killing extravaganza.
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Paden
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 23 Oct 2002
Posts: 9362
Location: North CAROLINA!
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Posted: 08/09/03 - 23:34 Post subject:
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I feal you man! Thats deep.
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lumber
Luke Warm
Joined: 08 May 2003
Posts: 331
Location: Central Florida
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Posted: 08/09/03 - 23:53 Post subject:
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| Paden wrote: | | I feal you man! Thats deep. |
Ok, you're on my side now Paden. I like u.
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TrueParadox
Sir Postalot
Joined: 10 Jul 2003
Posts: 1005
Location: No Place Interesting
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 07:11 Post subject: Re: Confused
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| Mental Hernia wrote: | Ever get so confused?
This relates to work, again. I was at work the other day, and someone pleaded with me to serve them a large popcorn, and I thought about it, more than I usually do. Why does he need the popcorn? Why do I need the popcorn? As it is my job, I reluctantly agreed. I scooped a large helping of popcorn into the bag, and then another.
As I did this, the popcorn began to devour my arm, in a cool tingling sensation one can only get when serving popcorn. The kernels were now teeth, biting me, and licking me, like little golden retriever puppies. Maybe this was why he wanted the popcorn. But how could he know?
Then I served him the butter, and it dripped down, the coldest thing I had ever seen. Some of it missed the bag, and what a terrible waste it was. I bent my head down, and licked it up. I've never been so refreshed in my life.
I handed him the bag, and he handed me the money, and our exchange was made. I still had popcorn, and now he had popcorn. It was his job to pour salt over it, and that is a sensation I cannot experience. |
Ummmm... if that popcorn makes you feel like that. I want THREE bags, and a canister of da fumes! What a comletely Salvadore Dali kinda surreal post!
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Bait Masterson
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 3842
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 10:45 Post subject:
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You have now entered the Elarvus zone
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Clevinger
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 3765
Location: Austin
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 12:11 Post subject:
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great story MH i remember liking it the first time just never got around to posting : /
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Gethy
RealPoor Master of Posts
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 5595
Location: Tallahassee, FL
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 12:55 Post subject:
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Only a popcorn scooping machine could scoop popcorn that well. And only a popcorn buying machine could tap into the greater interest of the popcorn scooping machine. It is a relationship that, while horribly obese and dishearting (and deliciously buttery), exists in perfect homeostasis.
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scrotum
Toomuchtimeonhands
Joined: 13 Oct 2002
Posts: 828
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 16:52 Post subject:
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sounds like a nice acid trip
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Sabathius
RealPoor Guru
Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 2179
Location: San Angelo
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 18:52 Post subject:
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One time, we had these little packets of beef flavored popcorn flavoring...why we had them...i dunno... but we used to pour them into the popcorn machine and make beef flavored popcorn. It made the entire theatre smell like steak. I cried.
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XXMerlin2003xX
Luke Warm
Joined: 04 Feb 2003
Posts: 149
Location: Tuscompton, Al
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Posted: 08/10/03 - 23:56 Post subject:
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| Sabathius wrote: | | One time, we had these little packets of beef flavored popcorn flavoring...why we had them...i dunno... but we used to pour them into the popcorn machine and make beef flavored popcorn. It made the entire theatre smell like steak. I cried. |
i would have cried to have had some steak flavored popcorn 
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